The Sum of David

I didn’t do it, promise.

My amazing-wonderful-spectacular niece spent a few days with us this weekend, and I cannot tell you how absolutely thrilled I am that she loves dinosaurs as much as she does. Completely independent of me, I might add. She hatched a dino-egg and excavated some bones with her Grandpa Mike, and we read dinosaur poems and played dinosaurs. AND I QUOTE:

“You be a T-Rex and I’ll be a triceratops that’s making a circle to protect my babies.”

MELT.

We went to the Carnegie Science Museum, baked bread, and spent some serious time on the Wii Fit’s ski jump. Katie, Nana and I also had lots of fun making some fantastic drawrings.

Best. Robot. EVER.

Yeah? Then help me out.

The Brother graduates from high school next spring, and I’d like to impart some knowledge on the youngest babe of the Arnold clan. Also, I’m itching to do another typography project.

My hope is to create a poster full of life lessons that I’ve learned since high school. A rough list follows:

• Be thankful every day.
• Credit card companies are evil.
• If you have a question, always ask.
• A bad situation will probably be really funny tomorrow. Sometimes it might take a week.
• The ingredients for any healthy relationship are trust, communication and respect.
• The Steelers are the best football team. EVER.
• Mistakes are important and okay. Learn from them.
• First impressions are important, but rarely accurate. Give it another round.
• Bad things do happen to good people.
• You are who you surround yourself with.
• Things could almost always be worse.
• Attitude is everything.
• Every situation offers a lesson. Try to find it, good or bad.
• Be tenacious.
• You can agree to disagree.
• Learn to let it go.
• Your first instinct is probably the right one.
• Learn from the past. Live in the present. Plan for the future.
• Do what you love.

Nothing can replace life experience, of course, but a cheat sheet can’t hurt.

Is there anything you wish you’d known at 18? Any obstacles you would have liked to have been warned about? Deep, silly — let’s hear it!

I have been overestimating my abilities lately. First, I challenged my girlfriend Kelly to an arm-wrestling match. Not only did I lose, I lost in spectacular never-had-a-chance fashion. In my defense, she has a black belt in kung fu. That is the salve I’m using on my ego, anyway. It’s not really helping all that much.

Secondly, in an effort to extend some creative horizons, Val and I decided to attempt a creative project that we thought would be fun: make an alphabet!

Fun? Yes. Difficult? VERY MUCH YES. Conclusion? We have too many letters in our English alphabet. We’re a culture that runs on efficiency. Can’t we consolidate any of these sounds? Seriously, no one uses X, not really.

All kidding aside, it was a wonderful, eye-opening learning experience. My day job as a designer makes me love and appreciate fonts anyway, but that appreciation has shifted into something akin to idolization because letterforms are HARD. Especially since nothing I did required anything in the way of actual skill. Using ink and a straw sort of removes any real decision-making from the process, since the ink kind of did whatever it wanted to do, despite my best efforts to make it behave. I’m calling that a blessing in disguise, however, since I didn’t have much say on where a cross-beam went because I wasn’t in control. At no point was I in control. We’re lucky I got all 26 capital letters, and I’m not telling which ones I called it in on just because I wanted to be done.

One day, I hope to make an entire font. As in, a real font. But this will do for now. Hmm… blotchy!

If you don’t become a little misty eyed at any point in this movie, I would suggest getting a medical examination because your heart is probably made of cold, hard steel. I teared up at least three times, and had trouble recounting certain scenes with my movie partner on the way home.

I had heard it was supposed to be an epic puller of heart-strings, but I honestly hadn’t anticipated how heavy it was. Do you remember the beginning of Finding Nemo, when Nemo’s mom gets eaten? I was admittedly distraught. When the Sad Thing in the first ten minutes of Up happens, I was ready to go home and take two bottles of sleeping pills. Holy smokes. It’s not a surprising turn of events, but the execution is excruciatingly beautiful.

The plot opens on Carl Fredrickson, a curmudgeonly old man that’s holding out on selling his property to a big corporation. It is the house he and his wife Ellie met in, the house they bought, the house in which they grew old together. When an accident leads the court to rule that ancient Mr. Fredrickson is a menace to society, he is ordered to vacate his home and it seems the corporation has won. Instead, he unfurls a cloud of helium balloons and he and his house float away. His destination? Paradise Falls, South America — a site of exploration that he and Ellie had dreamed about since they were children.

All seems peaceful and right with the world until, several thousand feet up in the sky, there is a knock on the door. Russell, a boyscout desperate for his final badge for “helping the elderly” had been under the porch, dutifully searching on the Snipe Hunt that Carl put him on the day before, when the house lifted off. After some in-the-air drama, Carl and Russell find themselves near Paradise Falls, stuck with one another. The mission — which was to fulfill Carl’s promise to Ellie of taking her to Paradise Falls — is to now set the floating house by the waterfall. The two unlikely companions set off to guide the bobbing structure across the ravine, encountering a mysterious bird, an outcast talking dog, and some dangerous characters that want to make sure that Carl, Russell and their new friends don’t make it out of the valley alive.

Pixar’s storytelling is always good — Finding Nemo and A Bug’s Life are on my top ten list — and Up is no exception. The formula is less obvious than most movies, which was refreshing. I will say my mind had an issue with the logitics of a house floating on a bunch of helium balloons, but I went with it. I also didn’t really like the convenience of them accidentally finding themselves in Paradise Falls. BUT. I went with it.

Pixar’s animation is always flawless. It almost isn’t worth mentioning because it is always so damn good. Carl and Russell’s character designs were both works of art. These humans were highly stylized, almost muppet-like, and I loved them so much for it. The expressions were subtle, beautiful, perfect.

And someone give Jordan Nagai and Ed Asner some kind of gold statue. Best. Voices. EVER.

There were a lot of lessons to be learned from Up. Don’t wait too long to fulfill your dreams. Love the people you’re with while they’re here, because they won’t always be around. The little things really do count. It’s just a house. 

I can’t say it hard enough: see this movie. And bring a hankey.

… so far, anyway.

Herbs!

I forget what these are. One of these is a hot pepper.
The others are… a surprise, I guess.

Green beans!

 Maters! They are surrounded by barbed wire, armed guards and lasers.
Or will be, if that stupid rabbit gets through the fortress we built…

You either love the Star Trek franchise and were going to go no matter or what, or you’re human and breathing and saw the bad ass trailers. Hopefully, if you haven’t made it out yet you’ll find your bottom in a theater seat soon… because it’s totally worth it.

My parents were Trekkers for the Original Series, and my sister and I grew up with The Next Generation. I didn’t care for Deep Space Nine when it aired, but I caught a lot of it on syndicate a couple years ago and liked it much more. I enjoyed Voyager, although I didn’t see much of it. I admit I never watched any of Enterprise.

~

The new movie was good. Great, even. It was sexy enough, campy enough, modern enough, gritty enough. A revitalization of the entire franchise, easy.

The casting was perfect. Chris Pine, who I doubted could pull it off, plays a believable Kirk that is fearless, foolish, quick on his feet and willing to get the job done no matter what. Zachary Quinto’s Spock is more emotional than the Nimoy’s Spock, but I found his struggle refreshing since I never remembered that Spock was half human in the series and OS movies. The secondary characters had bigger parts than before, too. Sulu? Delightful. Chekov? Freakin’ adorable. I wanted to pinch his little hyper-active, eager-to-prove-himself cheeks. Uhura was sexy and smart. Bones was lovably cranky, as usual. DeForest Kelly would have been proud. Neo was a convincing bad guy, and Kirk’s Commander Pike was exactly everything that I had imagined him to be.

And Scotty? Good lord. Simon Peg plays the perfect Scotty. There is a point in the movie when Kirk says “Let’s get out here”, and as we were sitting in the theater I thought to myself: “If this movie is to pass my test with any sense of worthiness, they will not be able to get away and Scotty will say what I am dying for him to say.” And they couldn’t and he did say it, and my arms shot up in the air in triumph. I would say I embarrassed myself but it was a theater full of Trekkers and so there is no place for misplaced enthusiasm.

The movie was also beautiful. Whether they were on-planet, on a ship or in outer space, the settings and environments were beautiful. The sound was spectacular, both in the effects that made the environments believable and the music. The technology design was wonderfully authentic-looking, and the special effects and fighting looked real (can I get an “Amen” for no obvious wire work?). Everything worked together to lend credibility to the current movie while paying homage to where this highly successful franchise began.

And now to the story: I liked it. I was a good basic movie plot, and a good choice for Star Trek. I won’t go into too many details, but events unfolded in a natural way, with all the right OMG moments. Nobody’s introduction felt that forced, and things went bad in the way they should have. Major kudos on the dialogue, too. There were a few phrases that gave me chills*. And wow, just wow: it takes some serious cajones to effectively wipe out one of the pinnacle alien species in the series.

There were only two things I had issues with. One, a black hole is a proven space anomaly. It is not an all-purpose Time Machine / planet destroyer / hang-out spot for bad guys. And the return of an original crew member? Meh. He is iconic, true, and his return was a big part of the plot, but… meh. The most boring part of the movies were the ones that involved him. He is too old, and I felt he hobbled through the part.

Still, consider the torch effectively passed. And one can consider the franchise truly rebooted since the timeline is all jumbled now and no one knows what’s going to happen next. I think I read the cast has signed on for two more movies, and I’m thrilled — I can’t wait for the next installment.

*”Your father was captain for 12 minutes and saved 800 lives. I dare you to do better.” Man, that’s good.

There are certain times during the year that demand contemplation on the Future. New Year’s is one of those times for many people, but I find myself also thinking about things when the seasons change. It just so happens my birthday is at that part of the year where Western PA is debating between snow and summer-like heat (it usually just settles on rain). And since there’s changes afoot in the natural world, there may as well be potential changes afoot with me, my age and my plans.

I already mentioned I’m taking the summer off to write, and it’s a good thing too — I’ve decided on a deadline for the culmination of my David trilogy. My brother graduates high school in May 2010, and I’d like to hand him a little set of the trilogy as a graduation present. I began The Sum of David in 2005 as a gift for him, so I think it appropriate to present him with a set of the finished product when he’s beginning a new chapter in his life.

I’ll even put some money in there, so he doesn’t have to pretend to be excited.

That’s almost an entire year. A year sounds like a lot, doesn’t it? You’d think so, but no: my first editor has had my 3rd draft manuscript for David 2 for going on five months now. So in order to get it through the hands of at least three editors by May 1st, when I would send away to get the one-off books made, I’m going to need a completed first draft by… next Tuesday, probably.

Surprisingly, I’m actually almost ready to get started. I need to sift through David 2 once before it goes to Editor #2 — who, by the way, agreed so quickly to edit yet another of my stories that I could have cried — and then I’m back in the races, ready to rock.

Dare I say it, @joshsager? The next six months will be very interesting.

It’s that time of year again. Magic’s in the air.

Let me preface this by saying that as far as Marvel comic geekery goes, I am maybe 2 1/2 out of five stars, TOPS. On a good day. If the synapses are firing and I dreamed I was a student at the X Mansion the night before.

Which is why I feel only a pang of treachery when I shrug and say: I kind of liked it.

When we left the theater, I was not liking it, but that was mostly because they put a young, fully mobile and ENTIRELY FREAKIN’ CGI CHARLES XAVIER AT THE END. Come ON. I know Patrick Stewart’s no spring chicken, but come the &*$%@ ON. There’s Make up. Or Lighting. Or they could have only show him from behind. Something. A CGI Professor was just unnecessary.

Ahem. Now that that’s out of the way.

The story didn’t match up with Wolverine’s previously explored origin stories, but it was… okay. If you looked at the movie as completely separate from any previous Wolverine material, it helped. The green screening was not flawless and the CG had some issues. Some of the dialogue was pretty bad, and I hate obvious wire work. And Gambit… did he get his bowstaff from a wizard or a pimp? Weak.

Despite its many flaws, I actually did enjoy it. Hugh Jackman makes a great Wolverine, and Ryan Reynolds? with swords? Oh, yes please. Wolverine’s romance was sweet, and included a twist I didn’t see coming. Barring some truly heinous fire escape ridiculousness, most of the gratuitous over-the-top action scenes were still fun*. The soundtrack was smokin’, and super-powers in general are just fun.

Plus, I wasn’t that familiar with Deadpool before the movie, but I’d be interested in seeing more of him, at least before [spoiler].

All in all, worth the price of admission. Wolverine is just a bad ass, pure and simple, and it’s fun to watch him be all bad ass-y, even when he’s doing it around bad CGI and cardboard dialogue.

*Kill an airborne helicopter with your bare hands and I’m yours.

Josh and I have been trying to become more “green”. The city of Pittsburgh has now deemed recycling a mandatory affair, which was just the push we needed. We purchased our little blue buckets, emblazoned with the arrow symbol, and now happily fill them with glass and plastic and metal and paper things. I am thoroughly enjoying it, since it is a chance to more fully involve my love of Tetris — sort, sort, sort — into my every day life. Our plan is to eventually have more recyclables than landfill garbage. I know, I know, we hippies should probably cut our hair and get jobs.

Also part of the plan: a more extensive vegetable garden. I tried a small garden last year with what I’ll call “moderate success”. Out of six plants, three were decimated overnight by a rabbit, and the remaining yielded about 1.2 million yellow pear tomatoes and a single green pepper.

A friend came up last weekend bearing a large bag of vegetable seed packets and we spent part of Saturday planting them. It was during this time that I realized, while she poked holes in fresh potting soil with a kabob stick and I delicately delivered little seeds into said holes, that I am such a city mouse. Good grief. We giggled like little girls that got a forbidden Ouiji board into a fourth grade sleepover.

Look. I spent weeks at my aunt’s farm for several summers during my childhood. I’ve helped bale hay and performed other farmly duties. I’ve collected items from my grandparents’ garden. Planting seeds should not have been as silly as it was, but I felt like I was performing 7th year Hogwarts magic. Classic quotes from the afternoon included:

“How will they know to wake up?”

“Augh!” (There were bees)

“Oh, right. Yes, well, I guess pea seeds would, of course, be… peas.”

That’s just embarrassing. There is also the issue of where I am going to put them all once they begin growing, but I’m still not convinced I did it right or that anything will come from the little things. I saw them when I put them in. They did not look alive, I tell you.

And, yes, they are spending their formative time in a cut-off Yeungling box. Because that’s how we do it here in Pittsburgh (yinz).

There’s nothing like a death in the family to make you re-evaluate your priorities.

Josh’s grandfather passed away on Tuesday. He was 86, a veteran of the second World War and one of the happiest, optimistic, cheeriest men I’ve ever met, even as his body slowly failed him. He is the reason Josh loves the Cubs, why Josh insists on scoring every baseball games we attend. The last time we saw him, over Thanksgiving weekend, he drove himself to lunch and we had a great couple of hours, him wheeling his little oxygen tank behind him to and from the salad bar, weeks before having a leg amputated. He will be missed greatly.

Life is too short, and I think am on a path to burn-out. I’m taking the summer off for personal projects. So there.